Discrimination and Chicken

Chick Fil A has better than average fast food.  They have golden wheat buns and I want to nom it.  There is a new location opening near me very soon.  I think it would be fun if a large number of the free chicken seekers were wearing T-shirts to support marriage equality, had rainbow flags draped over their tents or something of the like.   Something subtle that they can't be aggressive about.  No words.  No signs.  Just a subtle protest of their discriminatory messages.

Because here's the thing about Marriage Equality, if you are against it, you may as well be a racist.  Get out your pointy white hood.  Go ahead.  What?  You think that's an unfair comparison?  It's not.  It's a perfectly valid comparison and here's why.

Racism and homophobia are same level of hate. 

*Racists believe that one race is superior to another.  
*Christian conservatives believe that being straight is moral and righteous and being gay is a sin. 
Straight people are superior to gay people and gay people should strive to be as good as straight people.  Does this really sound okay to you when I read it back like that?  You can't be serious?  You actually believe that who you fall in love affects your value as a human being?  Are you starting to get my point?  Not yet?  Keep reading.

*No one can control what race they are born as. 
*No one can control who they are physically attracted to.
You can't discriminate based on a physical attribute like the color of someone's skin.  That would be wrong, right?  Being born gay is no different than being born Black or Hispanic or Asian or disabled.  It's not something that anyone has any control over and it's not something you remove rights for.

*Racist people believe that "separate but equal" is acceptable.
*People who are against marriage equality believe the same thing. 
Civil unions are great and I'm glad we have them and all, but they are not an acceptable solution.  Like black and white water fountains, some people must keep gay marriage separate from straight marriage.  If people see us using the same services, they won't understand that one is clearly different from the other and superior.  In other words, "Don't get your gay cooties all over my good traditional marriage with my third wife."  The separate-but-equal compromise isn't even acceptable to some of these bigots.  They don't want the gay cooties on anything that resembles marriage, because then something might go horribly wrong with all straight marriages everywhere.  I don't know what that is, but it might happen!

*It sounds silly now, but racist people used their religion to validate their hate.
*It sounds silly, but Christian conservatives right now use their religion to validate their hate. 
That white hood that I mentioned earlier?  Those people used the Bible and their religion to justify horrible actions that with the hindsight of history are clearly wrong.  Clearly. Wrong.  Got that?  Killing people because they are black and fighting against their struggle to be free and equal is wrong.  Just 50 years after the Civil Rights Movement and we mostly agree on this as a country.  However, for some reason we think it's okay for a religion to encourage and support hate of people who are gay.


The point here, if you haven't figured it out yet, is that if Chick Fil A was making donations to racist organizations, there would be no question of whether or not this is wrong.  We have finally decided as a culture that racism is wrong.  The gray area doesn't exist any more.  It's wrong to judge someone by the color of their skin.  It's wrong to judge them for their sexuality.  It's that cut and dry.  Marriage Equality is necessary for us to move on and grow as a country, just as abolishing racism was 50 years ago.  In the decades to come, I suspect that we will look back on this struggle as we look back at the Civil Rights Movement.  Our children won't believe how silly we were.  People who fought for discrimination will keep it to themselves as it will be something to be ashamed of.

The lure of tasty chicken on wheat buns shouldn't weigh into a decision about discrimination.   It took me a while to take a firm stance on this issue.  I waffled for want of waffle fries, but since drawing this comparison, I can't see it any other way.  The enticement of the new location won't outweigh my morals.  I'm putting away my wallet and supporting marriage equality instead of fried chicken and pickles.

All that said, if I were to wait with the First 100 and get the free year's worth, that would be okay, right?  Free chicken noms for me and no guilt about my money supporting hateful discrimination.  If I waited out the 24 hours wrapped in a rainbow flag, would it send the message I wish to send?  I'm not going to do it.  I have other plans that day, but I wish that someone would.

   
 

Heteroflexible?

An interesting side effect of our polyamory discussions is that I am now free to consider sexual experiences with other people in a way that my brain wouldn't allow me to before.  This has forced me to consider things that I have not thought about since high school.

Back then, I realized I was sexually attracted to girls.  I even told people.  I told my mom I was bisexual! Which was not a good idea, but I didn't know how homophobic she was at the time.   I told my group of guy friends in my music class which girls I thought were hot.  Then I got in a long term relationship with a guy that lasted for 3 1/2 years.  When we broke up I dated other guys until my friendship with my now husband opened up romantically.  I had written off my "bisexual phase" as a byproduct of teenage hormones and never spoke of it again.  I was a little embarrassed about it.  I still appreciated attractive women, but I did not get any sort of sexual response looking at girls.

A combination of the fact that other people are available to me sexually and being off hormonal birth control (something else I will write about my experiences with) has made me feel like a teenager again in a lot of ways.  There's probably also the aspect of my age, 28, and becoming less inhibited that is to blame as well.   One of the effects is a raging crush on a girl I see on a regular basis.  She can fucking dance.  She's adorable and funny and makes Monty Python references.  She has a boyfriend.  This has forced me to reexamine a lot of things.  I e-mailed my best gay friend and came clean.  His response: "I TOLD YOU IT WAS CONTAGIOUS!" and total support, of course. 

I don't know what this means or how far I'd want to go with a girl.  I can't really picture myself eating pussy but as my husband points out, I have "read the book".  The book is She Comes First by Ian Kerner and it can change your life.  There was a time in my life that I couldn't picture myself sucking a dick either and that time is long gone.  For now, I will consider myself heteroflexible and take comfort in Dan Savage's insistence that it is normal for women to have a more fluid sexual orientation that changes throughout a lifetime.

Andrew in Drag

In love with this video...  I have a new found fascination with drag kings after going to my first drag show and this indulges it!